Hold Me Tight® : 7 Conversations for a Lifetime of Love – February 7-9, 2020

Presenters: Lisa Blum, PsyD and Silvina Irwin, PhD

Drs. Silvina Irwin and Lisa Blum are offering this educational and experiential workshop which teaches you the core concepts of Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), heralded as one of the most effective couples therapies by the New York times and endorsed by the American Psychological Society as scientifically proven. These workshops are based on the international best-selling book Hold Me Tight: 7 Conversations for a Lifetime of Love by Dr. Sue Johnson. These transformative workshops will help you reconnect, repair, and re-energize your relationship and help you create a positive loving bond that will last a lifetime.

Dates:  February 7-9, 2020

Time: Starts Friday at 3 PM and ends Sunday by 1 PM.  See schedule below for details

CE Units: 14.0

Location:  Temecula Creek Inn

44501 Rainbow Canyon Road
Temecula, CA 92592



  • Regular Registration per couple is $1350.00.

  • A limited number of discounts are available for students. Please inquire for availability and rates.

Course Level: This course is suitable for beginning, intermediate and advanced-level practitioners.


Clicking on the registration button above will take you away from this web site to the EFT Resource Center registration page for this event.


Participants in this workshop will be able to:

  1. Define secure and insecure attachment using the terms of attachment theory.
  2. Describe 2 attachment strategies that people employ when their attachment bond is threatened in their primary relationship.
  3. Describe the neurobiological underpinnings and health effects of secure attachment.
  4. Identify the three most common interaction patterns of couple distress.
  5. Describe the connection between underlying vulnerable attachment emotions such as fear
    and sadness and the surface behavior or critical anger or emotional withdrawal.
  6. Explain how in a couple one person’s attachment strategy when experiencing relational distress directly impacts their partner and activates their partner’s attachment distress.
  7. Describe the Self-Reinforcing nature of a couples negative cycle from an attachment perspective.
  8. Describe how individual emotional vulnerabilities and personal attachment history contribute to the specific interactional patterns of couples in distress.
  9. List a 5-step process for interrupting a stuck pattern of couple disconnection and distress to restore a felt sense of safe emotional engagement.
  10. Describe and implement communication exercises that will deepen understanding of distress patterns intimate relationships and help people increase sense of trust, connection, and stability.
  11. Describe the process for forgiveness in couple’s distress.
  12.  List 2 ways to keep romantic love alive.

Lisa Blum, Psy.D. (PSY#19790) is a licensed clinical psychologist who specializes in promoting healthy couple and family relationships.  Dr. Blum is an ICEEFT-Certified Therapist and Supervisor Candidate in Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFT), one of the few research-validated therapies for helping couples and families strengthen relationships and build stronger connections.  Dr. Blum is in private practice in Pasadena and West Hollywood, where her work includes individual, couples, and family therapy, and supervision, training, and public speaking on family, marital, and parenting issues. Dr. Blum has worked as a mental health professional since 1987, and has worked extensively with parents and children, teachers and staff both in clinical practice and in community settings, and she consults to public and private schools and organizations to develop programs that support families.

Dr. Blum’s previous experience includes: Supervising Psychologist at the Institute for Girls’ Development in Pasadena; Supervising Psychologist for Children’s Hospital¬-Los Angeles; Staff Researcher at the UCLA Center for Adolescent Health Promotion; and Director of Education for the HiTOPS Teen Health Center in Princeton, NJ, where she designed educational programs for teens, parents, and teachers on healthy adolescent development. Dr. Blum holds Masters and Doctoral degrees in Psychology from Rutgers University and a Bachelors degree in Psychology with honors from Cornell University.

Silvina Irwin, Ph.D. (PSY#19710) is a licensed clinical psychologist in private practice in Pasadena, CA. and co-founder of the EFT Resource Center.   She is an ICEEFT Certified Trainer, Supervisor and Therapist in Emotionally Focused Therapy.  Dr. Irwin specializes in working with survivors of childhood and adult trauma, focusing on healing and recovery at the individual level, as well as addressing the impact that traumatic experiences have on intimate relationships in her work with couples.   Dr. Irwin works with teens, adults, families and couples. In addition to providing clinical services, Dr. Irwin conducts trainings and workshops for professionals in the community, including the police department, Office of the District Attorney, psychotherapists and psychology trainees at various centers, and medical staff at local hospitals to name a few.

Dr. Irwin trained at Harvard Medical School, and at the University of San Francisco, California Medical School. She received her Masters and Ph.D. in Clinical Psychology at the University of Massachusetts Boston.  She was trained and mentored by Dr. Sue Johnson, founder of Emotionally Focused Therapy.


Day 1


3:30pm – 4:30pm KEY CONCEPTS

– Attachment Theory, secure attachment, Neurobiological underpinnings. – power-point and video presentations

4:30pm – 4:50pm IN CLASS EXERCISE

– ARE conversations; “Goals” worksheet; Strengths worksheet

4:50 – 5:00 BREAK – 10 minutes


– Key Concepts (strategies to cope with disconnection, Fight or Flight strategies, typical negative “dance” or patterns of disconnection)
– In Class Exercise

Day 2


– Key Concepts – Primary emotions, amygdala hijacking, vulnerability and shame
– In-Class Exercise

11:00 am – 11:10 am BREAK (10 min)


– Key Concepts – Feelings v. behavior, reactions and patterns, raw spots)
– Role Play
– In-Class Exercise

1:10 pm – 1:40 pm BREAK FOR LUNCH


– Key Concepts -Attachment injuries, Healing attachment injuries
– DVD Couple Example
– In Class Exercise: Healing Injuries
– Debrief
– Homework

Day 3

9:00 am – 9:45 am RECAP OF DAY 2 AND HOMEWORK REVIEW – 45 minutes

9:45 am – 11:45 am HOLD ME TIGHT SEGMENT

– Key Concepts: – Strengthening bonds, HMT conversations
– DVD Couple Example
– In Class Exercise: Hold Me Tight

11:45 am – 12 noon CONVERSATIONS 6 and 7

– Key Concepts
– Sexuality and Attachment
– Keeping the Love Alive

12 noon – 12:30 pm SUMMARY and CLOSING

– Summary slides on material covered in course
– Closing processing

12:30 pm Evaluations

Please go to the EFT Resource center website for more information, or click on the Registration button above

Illuminated Education is approved by the American Psychological Association to sponsor continuing education for psychologists. Illuminated Education maintains the responsibility for this program and its content.

California masters-level therapists licensed by the Board of Behavioral Sciences should note that the BBS accepts APA approval for continuing education activities.

If you are a psychologist or other mental health practitioner licensed outside of California, please check with your licensing board to make sure that APA sponsor approval is sufficient for CE credit in your state or province.

For assistance in assessing whether you can obtain credit for this course, please contact Illuminated Education (Dr. Chris Cooper, 626-744-9472, cdcooperphd@earthlink.net).

Cancellation Policy and Refunds:

Cancellations prior to 1/07/2020 at 12 pm will be eligible for a 100% refund, minus a $25.00 processing fee. Cancellations after 12 pm on 1/07/2019 will be subject to a $625.00 cancellation fee, and the remainder of the registration fee will be refunded. HOWEVER, you will have a credit with us for the remaining registration amount to be used at a future workshop offered by the EFT Resource Center. This policy is the most generous that we can offer; the cancellation fee is necessary because of the commitments we make to the hotel or retreat center where we are holding the workshop.

More information and logistical details about this workshop can be found below the registration button above.

For information about refunds and accommodations, please see the EFT Resource Center website (www.eftresourcecenter.com) or contact Dr. Chris Cooper (Illuminated Education) by phone (626-744-9472), FAX (626-585-0440, or email (cdcooperphd@earthlink.net). If emailing, please reference this program in the subject line.

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